Grief for a way of being….

This morning something caught me…a simple everyday little thing…and my eyes filled with tears. It felt like grief.

Talking to a special pal this morning (xx) she and I concurred that grief is about letting go. We grieve for loved ones lost and we also grieve for situations, ways of being, that were important to us and we have had to leave them behind.

Post-divorce I built the life I envisaged for myself and my daughter and in the main achieved it. I discovered though that it was not built on solid foundations. So I have stripped it back and I am coming at it again from another angle.

Still looking upwards though as there is so much to look forward to and with firm foundations I can start to feel the solid landing stage under my feet.

It is important to allow time to grieve and wrap kindness around as I do so. No time limit. Gentle acceptance, trust and faith that this all contributes to a solid foundation.


18 Responses to “Grief for a way of being….”

  1. 1 ShimonZ June 15, 2012 at 3:58 pm

    yes, grief can help


  2. 3 Jeannie June 7, 2012 at 5:13 pm

    I too know exactly what you mean dear Jane. The comfort and loveliness of days past–I want to keep them forever just as they are but life has a way of marching us forward and creating a new normal. No doubt, somewhere down the road you will look back to this day and yearn for it as your discovery time, a special time of significance. Love to you dear one as you navigate all the twists and turns. xoxox


    • 4 Jane Thorne June 7, 2012 at 8:12 pm

      Thank you Jeannie for your support…it’s a journey I wouldn’t have any other way as the foundations being built are strong this time and the new horizons opening up sparkle so brightly..much love to you xoxox


  3. 5 Martin Shone June 7, 2012 at 4:45 pm

    Time… allows space for the grieving of past situations … time, faith and trust allows for the building of foundations for the future xx H


  4. 7 Eric Alagan June 7, 2012 at 2:36 am

    Jane buddy, I believe tears are God’s way of healing us…and all in His time which is actually in our time, when we are ready.

    I focus on what is going well and am so very happy that it is all coming together for you.

    Luv and great big hugz, Eric


    • 8 Jane Thorne June 7, 2012 at 8:43 am

      It is coming together and thank you for your care and kind thoughts..much love as always to you my lovely buddy xxx


  5. 9 granbee June 6, 2012 at 8:21 pm

    Oh, Jane, I cry with you for former dreams abandoned and celebrate with you for marching steadily forward into new explorations, as you are so vibrantly doing! Praying for you and Em! (And still celebrating your fine, occasional collaboration with Martin!)


    • 10 Jane Thorne June 6, 2012 at 10:02 pm

      I love you Rose. All is well and coming together well. Em and I send loving thoughts back to you. Martin and I are continuing to work together xxx


  6. 11 lyndarenham June 6, 2012 at 7:32 pm

    I know exactly what you mean. I felt this very strongly on leaving my first marriage. I never believed things could come together as they have.
    Good luck and lots of love to you.


  7. 13 tornadoday June 6, 2012 at 5:01 pm

    Jane, I know exactly what you mean. Even this morning, I was talking with a friend about a lady in my office who is leaving the company. Ultimately, I know it is the right thing for her, but it reminded me of how many times over the years, I have worked with individuals for years and then they either left the company or the company left them. And always, I felt sorrow for a part of me knew I would most likely never see them again. Someone compared it to envy, but it’s not becaue envy is for something you’ve never had and grief is for something you’ve held to your heart. I think grieving is a part of love for surely you can’t miss what you never loved. This is beautiful. ~ Love, Bobbie


  8. 15 1smiles June 6, 2012 at 1:57 pm

    Ahhh Jane,
    I know this grief you speak of today. I too have been feeling similar grief at all of the losses I’ve experienced recently. Losses that were my choice, but still loss of what was my ‘normal’ life.
    Everything is new right now so nothing feels constant or ‘normal’.
    Hugs to you as you find your constants.
    Love you!
    Jeannie xxxx


    • 16 Jane Thorne June 6, 2012 at 2:01 pm

      Our constant my lovely friend is the faith that we are doing the right thing at the right time…and we are…love you with big hugs xxx


  9. 17 Elena Caravela June 6, 2012 at 1:43 pm

    No time limit. Hope today is a good day:)


    • 18 Jane Thorne June 6, 2012 at 2:00 pm

      It is…all days are Elena, I just get ‘caught’ now and then but quickly right myself. I am healing and building!! Love to you 😀 x


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