Stripped bare and the hidden wonders of vulnerability…

I had a front, a finely honed and solidly established persona that I showed the world. It carried me through some of the toughest times in my life and, glancing back, I knew of no other way to be.

My family and closest friends were used to my stock answer of ‘I am fine’ to any enquiry about how I was. Fine? I was far from it.

Recently I truly ‘let go’ and life as I knew it tumbled into dust. The loving friends who sheltered me, whilst a new path emerged, have bestowed gifts far beyond the day to day care and nurture they freely gave. A protective net extended to include some of their family and closest friends and the loving strands woven within wrap us all in safety.

In opening their home and their hearts, they have given me the gift of vulnerability. I had nowhere to run nor hide, so ‘I am fine’ would not wash. I didn’t go around weeping and wailing, instead a bare honesty emerged. Almost blinking in the daylight, I discovered that it is OK to receive and to reach out for help.

I was safely caught.

Pottering around cleaning my new nest this morning, it occurred to me that the gift of vulnerability has stopped the spiral of guilt, shame and pain that I have carried with me for years.

Now that is a good weight to lose.


20 Responses to “Stripped bare and the hidden wonders of vulnerability…”

  1. 1 brandyeli October 3, 2012 at 6:21 am

    Hi Jane,

    I have nominated you for the Sisterhood of the World Bloggers Award.

    Best, B Elizabeth NS


    • 2 Jane Thorne October 4, 2012 at 8:16 am

      Hello Elizabeth, how very kind of you and thank you for stopping by. I appreciate the thoughfulness in passing on this award and thank you for it, but I can’t convert it right now or anytime soon…work is manic and I am running to catch up. Thank you though and I wish you all the luck…just going to pop over and have a look at your blog. All the best, J πŸ˜€


  2. 3 mj monaghan October 2, 2012 at 9:50 pm

    Hello, Jane Thorne. Glad to hear you were caught safely, though I never doubted for a second that a gentle and kind spirit such as you would ever fall without a net popping up.


  3. 7 Eric Alagan September 30, 2012 at 1:11 pm

    What a fabulous ‘weight-loss program’ – many of us need this regime – trusting and hoping that we recognise this need when our time comes —

    With luv and hugz, Eric


    • 8 Jane Thorne October 4, 2012 at 8:11 am

      Oh my buddy, how great to hear from you. We may both be busy, but those golden buddy strands we share are not lost…big hugs and much love my buddy xx


  4. 9 LutheranLadies September 27, 2012 at 7:27 am

    What a beautiful reminder to me, that there’s nothing wrong with vulnerability. As a matter of fact, it takes strength to let the cracks show. Thanks and blessings on your new start.


    • 10 Jane Thorne October 4, 2012 at 8:08 am

      Lovely to hear from you and thank you for taking the time to leave such a thoughtful comment. My new start is flowing well and I am, as ever, so grateful to my loved ones. πŸ˜€


  5. 11 countingducks September 26, 2012 at 6:46 pm

    “The Hidden wonders of Vunerability”. What a beautiful concept. I’m beginning to wonder if we are related in some way as I am also a member of the “I’m Fine” club, I’ve been fine through unemploment, financial disasters, domestic upheavels and catering catastrophies so I can sympathise with you deeply. That you had friends who nurtured you is truely lovely and inspiring. It makes me happy to hear that and I’ve only just come across your Blog


    • 12 Jane Thorne October 4, 2012 at 8:07 am

      Hello Peter, thank you for taking the time to leave such a lovely comment, you are very kind. My new start is now taking off like a rocket, so maybe I don’t need time to catch my breath either when mass change happens. As I hurtle off this new cliff my parachute is holding and I will get to blog about it soon. I love your blog and have two of your posts ready to comment on…we may indeed be related! πŸ˜€ x


  6. 13 Maxi September 26, 2012 at 3:05 pm

    Dearest Jane, you have learned a life lesson. That it’s okay to say, “Life is a bit of a struggle at the moment,” instead of the automatic “I am fine.”

    May your life be filled with joy and peace.
    Blessings ~ Maxi


  7. 15 tornadoday September 25, 2012 at 3:08 am

    …and in return, you gave others a wonderful gift ~ the opportunity to love you even more. ~ Always, Bobbie


  8. 17 Linda Willows September 24, 2012 at 4:29 pm

    how brave vulnerability is…a beautiful post, Jane…love to you and a ‘Heart Wrap’, Linda


  9. 19 elenacaravela September 24, 2012 at 12:23 pm

    So beautifully and articulately written! I think many of us are terrified of vulnerability. Much like other anxieties, the fear is much worse than the reality. Great post Jane!


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