We own nothing, everything surrounding us is temporary and the love in our hearts lasts forever.

soft wishes

Just over a week ago Mum, Dad and I were tucked up drinking tea by the log burner on an early Saturday evening. We were quietly exploring the idea that it was time for them to move on, after thirty odd years here, and find a new home for this stage of their lives.

Their marriage of fifty five years has tested them time and again on their teamwork, ability to adapt and make the best of any kind of circumstance and goodness, in thinking back, they have had a few. They have successfully brought up three children, had various businesses, renovated and re-built a fair few homes, moved to Africa in the 1970s, returned from Africa five years later having lost everything but the shirts on their backs, had health issues with a triple heart bypass for Dad and two broken shoulders with replacement titanium ones for Mum and breast cancer, and the list goes on.

Here they are now, ‘shaking the tree’ again and pulling together to downsize and simplify their lives. There is much love and humour flying about, with many long standing family jokes seeing the light of day.

Dad called out the other morning, as we were all pottering about…

Dad “I’ve had an idea.”
Mum “Oh lawd, what now…” loud enough for him to hear…
Me “She is coming your way with joyful anticipation Dad.”

Queue much laughter……

We are now a hive of activity with sorting, clearing, planning, eBaying, house hunting, doing what we all do best, so Mum and Dad land exactly where they are meant to.

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30 Responses to “We own nothing, everything surrounding us is temporary and the love in our hearts lasts forever.”


  1. 1 bardessdmdenton April 4, 2014 at 6:45 pm

    Lovely reflection, Jane, on how your parents have endured but also flourished. My father died at 63 when my mom was only 57, so she has been a widow a long time (she’s now 85). I’ve lived with her for the past 23 years and it has been as interesting, difficult but ultimately a blessed situation that I hope continues for a long time yet. Life’s passage with gratefulness and humor is certainly very important! Thank you for sharing from your heart and wise observation, as always. XO β™₯

    Like

    • 2 Jane Thorne April 6, 2014 at 11:38 am

      Thnak you Diane, and gosh that is nearly thirty years for your Mum in this chapter of her life. I hope that I understand what you mean when you describe your time with your Mum, as I had a little glimpse with the few weeks I spent with Mum and Dad. It’s given us all something undefinable, a precious gift. Gratitude and humour certainly oil the wheels of life. Much love to you, Xxx

      Like

  2. 3 Marylin Warner March 22, 2014 at 8:07 pm

    Oh, Jane, I love your parents’ interaction and the way you tell the scene. Before his Alzheimer’s and now her dementia, that could have been my parents: survivors of building business and homes, raising children and meeting all kinds of challenges together, then gently mumbling about the next challenge.
    Wonderful post.

    Like

    • 4 Jane Thorne March 22, 2014 at 9:52 pm

      Thanks Marylin, you are so kind. We have had four weeks together and it has flown by. I left today to go on my travels and it was a wrench. So many gifts in this time we have had together. Love flowing across to you and your lovely family in Kansas. X

      Like

  3. 7 elenacaravela March 20, 2014 at 6:01 pm

    So true Jane. Just as we get comfortable, life sends us change. A delightful post. I hope your deserving parents find their dream cottage.

    Like

  4. 9 Maxi March 20, 2014 at 1:15 pm

    Forgive me Jane, I am in a daze today.

    Your parents are wonderful. I can hear the laughter and the planning and the excitement of the new adventure.

    They have reached into my heart from across the pond. I feel the fun. They can’t help growing old but … they will never BE old.

    blessings to you and your mum and dad ~ maxi

    Like

    • 10 Jane Thorne March 20, 2014 at 5:04 pm

      You are lovely Maxi and thank you for your very kind and loving words. Healing hugs and much love com,ing right back across the pond to you. Xxxxx ❀

      Like

  5. 11 Maxi March 20, 2014 at 1:04 pm

    “It is how I live β€” not what I have β€” that defines me.” Maxi Malone

    blessings to you, Jane ~ maxi

    Like

    • 12 Jane Thorne March 20, 2014 at 5:04 pm

      We are on the same wavelength Maxi….I said the other day. I am ‘me’, no more, no less and I am not defined by where I live. Much love and hugs to you. Xxxx

      Like

  6. 13 journeyintopoetry March 20, 2014 at 10:10 am

    What a lovely family! I had the privilege of a cosy family life and hope Ive extended this to my children; Im sure they would say I have Your mum and dad sound lovely people and so many years together is just wonderful. Downsizing after years in one place must be hard but we take the love with us don’t we. That can never be included in the sale. 😊

    Lots of love and funky teapot hugs
    xxx

    Like

    • 14 Jane Thorne March 20, 2014 at 10:15 am

      Yes, it is the love that lasts, always. I look at the pictures of your grandchildren visiting Chris and I know that you have woven a loving family in your life. Many happy cuppas my lovely friend. Much love and hugs, Xxxxx

      Like

  7. 15 ianscyberspace March 20, 2014 at 12:48 am

    Reminds me of my parents experience. They went through the depression of the 1930’s so know what its like to be poor. Built their fortune through hard work, lost it on a farming venture after the war and built their fortune by hard work all over again. They were wonderful role models for their children.

    Like

    • 16 Jane Thorne March 20, 2014 at 9:31 am

      Hello Ian, it’s lovely to hear from you and yes, they are wonderful role models. Their spirit is in your fabric, it comes through from reading your stories and the loving sense of family you have. πŸ™‚ x

      Like

  8. 17 Eric Alagan March 20, 2014 at 12:05 am

    Fifty years of togetherness is an achievement by any measure.

    The title says it well – ultimately, it’s what we take within us – in our hearts and minds.

    Like

    • 18 Jane Thorne March 20, 2014 at 9:29 am

      Hello my lovely buddy, I love your new gravatar. Yes, it’s whats in our hearts and our minds that counts, always. Much love to you. Xx with hugs xx

      Like

  9. 19 tornadoday March 19, 2014 at 7:13 pm

    I absolutely love this, Jane. My father walks me to the door, and mother calls that she has something for me. Dad tells her to hurry since it’s cold outside. She mumbles and he smiles (rolling his eyes). They’ve been together 58 years such that they can barely recall a time when they weren’t one. Surely the truth of love is how much we can bear, how much we can endure. Being together, we harm nobody; being apart, we extinguish ourselves. ~ Love to you, my rich rich friend. ~ Ever, Bobbie

    Like

    • 20 Jane Thorne March 19, 2014 at 7:43 pm

      Oh Bobbie, what a lovely reply. I knew that you would understand this and see life’s richness of gifts within. Love always, Jane Xxxx

      Like

  10. 21 grandfathersky March 19, 2014 at 5:54 pm

    So it was in Africa where you had your eyes opened to how poorly the world can behave?

    Like

  11. 23 Peter Wells aka Countingducks March 19, 2014 at 4:25 pm

    You sound like a lovely family, and your Mum and Dad are treasures

    Like

    • 24 Jane Thorne March 19, 2014 at 5:23 pm

      They show wonderful spirit don’t they Ducky? I have not forgotten your review…hopefully, I will do that tomorrow. πŸ™‚ x

      Like

  12. 25 smzang March 19, 2014 at 3:52 pm

    This is a joy to read!
    It reflect ups and downs, smiles and tears and most importantly
    a bond cemented with respect and love.

    Brava!!

    Like

  13. 27 Mother March 19, 2014 at 3:06 pm

    Amen to that – Your Mother

    Like

  14. 29 Al March 19, 2014 at 1:18 pm

    Wishing them the best in this endeavor. Sounds like a sweet couple with much love in their hearts. Glad you can be there to help them through. This is another of life’s passages which Patty and I will be facing sooner rather than later. Keep good notes!

    Like


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