Feel the peace of a moment and breathe….

St Meugan's

Just over the end of the lane from where I live there is a little church called St. Meugan’s. There has been a church on this site since the sixth century, and after repair and restoration in the 1800’s, she still stands today re-built in stone. I was on the way back from town on Friday and as I passed by there was a sign fluttering in the breeze on her walls ‘Church open’. I turned back and parked up. Stepping inside I was enveloped in a deep peace and I sat inside for a good long while, alone with my thoughts and the feeling of many centuries of prayers emanating from the walls.

I needed the peace…

I returned from the south of England a few weeks ago, having finished my last farm sit, and courtesy of my Dad’s trailer I brought all my stuff back with me. On the Monday I had an interview in Chester and landed a role as a community carer for disabled adults living in their own homes. I hit the ground running with it on Tuesday and bonded very quickly with the souls we flow care to. Dashing between homes across Chester, and dealing with all sorts of situations and circumstances, I had a ‘baptism of fire’, but I loved being with the patients. It took a few days to realise that my printed rotas/timesheets were not adding up and I made the discovery that in the care profession we are not paid for our travelling time. So last Saturday I completed a 14.5 hour shift which equates to 8.5 hours of actual pay. The pay was modest anyway, but with this balance I was virtually working for nothing and doing it in my own vehicle. A clear and pithy conversation with the owner of the agency I was working for, resulted in a boardroom discussion later with the directors and me exiting stage left. As I recall I was heard to comment ‘Do I look like I came down in the last shower of rain?’ as I glanced outside at the owner’s new upmarket vehicle with personalised number plates! The actual payment terms are not made clear on induction and their huge staff turnover is an indication of this. My leaving caused upset to the patients they care for and certainly distressed me. How can we care for those that are vulnerable, if we are not cared for in a basic way? It is not a profession one enters into for the pay, as this is far more vocational than working, but goodness me what a ‘eye opener’ this has been. As a society we are marginalising those who are so very vulnerable and reliant on those who are physically able to do right by them. This includes our government, but that is another topic.

So I stood back in my apartment, with tight finances, a poorly car, a need for new options and a weariness that seemed to go right through to my soul, as I thought ‘What do I do now?’. It was upon returning from my local town, chasing down work opportunites the next day, that I found St. Meugan’s.

I met an elderly gentleman as I was leaving the church, who was visiting his wife’s grave with flowers. We stood there chatting in the wind, looking up at the mountains and finding out a little about each other. I did not mention my current challenges, but he did ask me what kind of work I was doing and I said I was currently looking. I touched upon a few of the different things I could do and he made a suggestion that may not come into being, but he sparked a spirited feeling in me. I have always been better off paddling my own canoe and I came home to think about the different things I could do. I have now ordered a broadband service for my little place and I will go back to the telephone service work. There are a number of other self-employed irons in the fire and I am sure it will all flow in as it is meant to.

I am meant to be here, that much I am sure of.

To give myself a break today, I am painting artwork onto a wooden pine chest and writing. Sometimes it is good to do what soothes a weary soul and as I write I can hear the kestrels on the mountainside and the cows in the barn nearby.

It is also good to stop in a peaceful place and breathe…..bless St. Meugan’s.


31 Responses to “Feel the peace of a moment and breathe….”

  1. 1 Marylin Warner September 5, 2014 at 2:14 am

    Jane, this was such an honest, poignant–as well as helpful and hopeful–post. Thank you for all you do and the changes you make in so many lives. Including mine, as I read your wonderful posts.
    These two photos welcomed me to their silent, clam and peaceful spaces.
    Somehow, I think the conversation you had with the gentleman will reach out and bring you opportunities you didn’t imagine when you spoke with him.


    • 2 Jane Thorne September 5, 2014 at 9:58 am

      Dear Marylin, you have helped me more than you could know. I have entered an essay competition thanks to you, had many new creative ideas thanks to you and I love sharing your journey with you through your wonderful posts. Much love to you and all your family…hugs too for your Mum. ❤ The kind man in the church gave me a special gift that day as he reminded me of who I am and what I can do..that held magic. ❤


  2. 3 Aquileana August 27, 2014 at 6:05 pm

    Dear Jane,

    Your words reached my soul and heart .. It is so beautiful to find peace, meditate and make time to breath deeply.
    There are so many reasons to be grateful and blessed, don;t you think?
    Best wishes to you ❤
    Aquileana 🙂


    • 4 Jane Thorne August 28, 2014 at 8:57 am

      Hello lovely Aquileana, it is good to hear from you. Yes, in the silence and peace, gratitude has space to rise I am discovering. Love and hugs to you, ❤ Xx

      Liked by 1 person

  3. 5 smzang August 19, 2014 at 5:33 pm


    Again you have touched my soul with your day.
    Your writing is superb but it is your inner spirit
    that is unmatchable, unquenchable and a joy
    to behold.

    I do believe you are where you are meant to be,
    and I believe your path is awash with light.

    I am so glad that our paths have crossed. Reading
    your blog has lifted me up so many times.

    Thank you,


    • 6 Jane Thorne August 20, 2014 at 8:21 pm

      Dear Sarah, I am so touched by your comment, as it lifts me just when I needed a lift. Thank you so much for your kindness, our connection and the love that flows so freely between. ❤ xXx


  4. 7 elenacaravela August 18, 2014 at 1:52 am

    Sorry to hear that your work was undervalued in the monetary sense. I’m sure that what you do and the way you do it, is extraordinary. That’s why I feel sure that you will find a better situation. Very best to you Jane.


    • 8 Jane Thorne August 18, 2014 at 8:23 am

      Hello Elena, thank you for your loving and supportive words. I wil do the counselling on the phone service, face to face and I am going to create. A blend of the two will create a good heart song I reckon. Hugs for you ❤


  5. 9 tornadoday August 18, 2014 at 1:39 am

    I love this, dear Jane. Four years ago, my teaching gig was being cancelled because a grant had been lost. My thought of this agency who is in the business of caring, ‘so, you only care if you’re being paid’……. Sometimes, I think those who get rich from caring are likely doing a pitiful job. ❤ Listen to your heart, my love…….. always, it will lead you home. ❤


  6. 11 Maxi August 17, 2014 at 12:39 pm

    St. Muegan’s was placed in your path, Jane. One weary soul to another, to give comfort, to reflect and share. Mostly, to infuse one another with the assurance of peace.

    Prayers and love. Everything will work out.
    blessings ~ maxi


    • 12 Jane Thorne August 17, 2014 at 12:42 pm

      Absolutely Maxi and it is lovely to hear from you as always. I hope you are sailing in calmer waters in your world? Much flow and many hugs flowing to you my lovely. ❤ xXx


  7. 13 grandfathersky August 17, 2014 at 2:29 am

    It never fails that I wonder about how you are getting along, and you post your latest update. No you didn’t come down in the last shower, but the rain has been coming down on the likes of that man for far too long, and one day it will wash them and their Bentleys away. Not that I don’t appreciate a hand made anything, but I think there are few who can afford them who do, or even care one twit regarding the well being of the craftsmen who create them. I think you are wise to get the broadband, and to start culling a few pence from the ether, it is an amazing time we live in, where we can bring coin to ourselves in that way. I get a feeling that your crafts can bring you more than you imagine. I seem to recall you make furniture of some sort. Crafts persons are becoming more rare. (I’m thinking of restoring Volkswagens) My hands itch … Glad you found such a peaceful place.(dressed for the Trinity season – that’s another story) It will help you help others …
    As always – Peter


    • 14 Jane Thorne August 17, 2014 at 10:11 am

      Hello my wise friend Peter, you are ‘spot on’ in all you say and I will email you this morning…funny we are both going along the same lines. Much love to you and heartfelt thanks for all your support. ❤ xX


  8. 15 ianscyberspace August 17, 2014 at 1:11 am

    What a lovely setting you shared with us. That was a mean spirited group you worked with. Don’t you have any kind of protection in England from such unfair work practices?


    • 16 Jane Thorne August 17, 2014 at 10:08 am

      Hello Ian, yes it is called the minimum wage and is banded with age groups. I have some web links to check out and I will be pursuing this, as I believe the care workers are being paid under the minimum wage because of the actual hours worked. I just need to get my boat on an even keel first. x


    • 17 Jane Thorne August 17, 2014 at 10:08 am

      Ian, I also think all care agencies operate this way from what I have discovered, so it has become an ‘accepted’ industry standard. x


  9. 18 Eric Alagan August 17, 2014 at 12:25 am

    That church must hold much to soothe and calm – as you found. Happy that you made the discovery, Jane buddy.

    That agency boss reminds me of the many businesses in Singapore who engage foreign workers from India and Bangladesh – to handle all the heavy work in the construction and shipyard sectors. They pay the workers a pittance and house them in appalling conditions – but the bosses drive flashy cars and live in palatial homes. Govt is trying to fix this abuse – but as usual, moves too slow.

    Glad you got out of that one and I’m sure you’ll find something better.

    All good wishes and much luv from here 🙂


    • 19 Jane Thorne August 17, 2014 at 10:06 am

      Thanks my special buddy and yes, I do not think this is just a ‘UK’ problem. It is lovely to hear from you. Bg hugs for you and Lisa. ❤ xX


  10. 20 1smiles August 16, 2014 at 11:13 pm

    I could feel your weariness, you tremendously tender heart and the peace of St Meugan’s. I have faith in the future where ever that leads us. And you are indeed being led to just the right job.
    You have touched upon a very real problem, not just there, but here too… the care provided by those with huge hearts being taken advantage of by the agencies in place to help. Such an irony.
    Love and Peace to you,
    Jeannie xxxxxxx


    • 21 Jane Thorne August 17, 2014 at 10:05 am

      Yes, Jeannie you are right. If I have the strength when I have ‘righted’ my boat, I will tackle what happened. There are times though when I tire of being a ‘smoking gun’. Love and hugs hugs to you. ❤ xXx


  11. 22 bardessdmdenton August 16, 2014 at 7:39 pm

    ‘Sometimes it is good to do what soothes a weary soul and as I write I can hear the kestrels on the mountainside and the cows in the barn nearby.

    It is also good to stop in a peaceful place and breathe…’

    Oh, yes, Jane. So it is. Blessings. Diane XO ❤


  12. 24 Al August 16, 2014 at 4:51 pm

    Pretty neat place. Here in the states we marvel at places 400 to 500 years old. We’re mere pups compared to most places in Europe.


    • 25 Jane Thorne August 16, 2014 at 4:53 pm

      It’s all history Al and appreciated by us all…I remember in Africa, no buildings at the time were older than about 90 years, yet the bush was timeless. ❤ xX


  13. 26 journeyintopoetry August 16, 2014 at 4:09 pm

    What a beautiful little church Jane; Im pleased you found some peace there. Im so sorry this caring Job did t work for you. Its beyond ridiculous how caring jobs/professions are so underpaid. I started doing a job quite a few years ago now, working in conjunction with a care home for the elderly but taking meals cooked there out and about in the community. As you say, you dont do the job for the money but you expect to be treated better. I got no travel expenses either. It was exhausting as I was given a false job description; it inviolved much more than giving meals. I know you will find your way. You have the patience of Job and I could learn much about acceptance from you. Love you ❤️ Xxx


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