Holding our loving space….

In my sifting and sorting this week I have re-discovered my Granny’s tea set in a box. I have started to use her cups and I am going to plant her teapot, sugar bowl and jug up with spring plants. I let my Mum (her daughter) know about my discovery and then we went on to talk about family treasures in my space. The embroidered cloths that Mum has passed my way, Granny’s sewing basket that I use nearly every day, the bookcase that my Dad gifted his Mum when he got his first paycheck is with me too, holding my beloved books. Creative treasures that Emily, my daughter, has made over the years are here too, with a set of her paintings alongside a creative table I have put together. Everything in one place and accessible, so that I can create in a spark and not have to hunt for anything, or set anything out. Marvellous.

Each circle in each day brings me back to a calm centre within, where I am held in a loving space.

Sharp winds of change have blown through life lately and I have found peace in this calm centre. It’s not about denial of upset, because as feelings rise up like waves, I acknowledge them and then ‘park’ them. In turning my mind back to the nurture of creativity, and what soothes naturally, the temptation to layer up against the pain doesn’t happen. I flow with accepting that it is how it is.

So many times in my work and life I meet souls layered up and sheltering behind their shields. Sometimes so layered up that they have managed to convince themselves that they don’t need nurture at all. So many painful stories from the past playing out as if they are still happening now.

We are like vessels that fill up and whatever we hold inside gives us the view on how we experience life.

I spend my working days helping others to unpack and gift themselves some room within to breathe and explore new perspectives and options. Recently, a client said ‘I am sorry Jane, I can’t tell you what you have just said, but your voice is so calm I’m falling asleep.’ I burst out laughing, which made him chuckle…laughter and calm in his inner space. ❤

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Moodling in the circles of life….

This weekend, after two years ‘away’, my tools, personal treasures and creative bits and bobs circle their way back to land in my ‘happy bubble’ home.

I have promised to gift myself time to sift, sort and feel my way with each piece. The old loo at the end of my little hallway is not used and makes a grand storehouse. On deciding what to keep and what to let go of, maybe some new creative sparks will emerge, maybe they won’t. It is what it is in this moment.

There is an ease of acceptance that there is no workshop space to create in, yet there is floor space here that I can use. I am weaving with the wisdom that to let go of old hopes, dreams, ideas and accumulated stuff will create some much needed space for the new to say ‘Hello, what about trying this?’

In the sifting and sorting there may well be sparks of joy from new creativity and hopeful possibilities. That’s the kind of joy that burns away pain, letting the past settle and sending a message into the future on what might be.

Buds are appearing…

Yesterday the weather had settled a little and the Isle of Man catamaran ran again. She sailed through the gentle falling rain into port, yet with barely a ripple on the water. Today it is lashing it down with a mixture of snow and sleet with rain and hardy fisherman are sheltering in their tents on the prom, not even letting the weather deter them from their ‘timeout’.

There is a natural cycle that is never ending out there as the branches are waving in the wind. All the old leaves have fallen and if you look closely enough the signs of new buds are coming. The tree roots go way down into the ground, yet the branches, buds, blossom, fruit and leaves change throughout each year. Occasionally, the tree breaks and uproots when the storms rage.

I have been given pause to ponder lately on what happens when we don’t let our old leaves drop. Hanging on putting additional weight and pressure on our branches and in time choking the promise of life out of any new buds.

There is a vulnerability in letting the leaves go, as our branches are left bare and exposed with every single knot, scar, wrinkle, dent and bump there for all who care to see.

Carrying old leaves will give us a tree that resembles the old tree and the added weight can bend the branches beyond anything recognisable, as we shelter behind old foliage.

It’s painful to let the wind blow through your bare branches and feel the rainfall. Yet the wisdom in letting the rain in nourishes roots, allows the wind to strengthen foundation and the light to nurture new buds.

I am more than aware of the simplicity of my words and the meaning contained therein, yet sometimes the cry for simplicity can rage through the wildest of storms.

Creative comforts….

Work is challenging at this time of year and a few days ago I found myself needing comfort from a change of scene at midday. I took off in the car and made my way to a haberdashery store in Birkenhead. Ohhh, the bliss of standing there amidst all the materials, ribbons and yarns and new choices to be made. I came away with an uplifted heart and a bag of lovely soft wool to make Georgie’s next jumper.

Often I find myself suggesting to clients that they find comfort in creativity. They often cry out ‘But I am not creative Jane’. I gently point out that we all create with our days, spaces, meals, communications and actions. The simple act of tidying a drawer, sorting some clothes, organising a space, re-arranging a shelf or even a room can bring comfort. It’s all creativity. We can also be creative with writing, painting, sticking, colouring or making something.

I was blessed to be surrounded by loving, creative women as I grew up and my Mum, both my Grannies and my Great Granny taught my sister and I all the handcrafts. What gifts they bestowed along with rich memories.

There was a lovely blog post recently from Natalie Wordless Wednesday… as she shared the quilts she and her sister were creating. It reminded me of the creative ‘sharings’ with my Mum, my buddy Pam in South Africa, my sister Debs, the knitting girls, Kirsten, lovely Em in New Zealand, special Penn, Nancy downstairs, my sailing buddy Wendy and so many more. All linked by our stories and sharing what we are creating; all linked by loving comfort. ❤

#Booklaunch – Twenty Years: After “I Do” by D.G. Kaye

Tina’s lovely words and ‘share’ of Debby’s new book ‘Twenty Years after “I do”‘ is special and I wanted to share. Debby is an inspiration to so many of us and I can’t wait to read her latest book. Tina’s kindness shines out and the ‘whole’ is wrapped in love. ❤

TINA FRISCO

Debby Gies, akaD.G. Kayehas just released her 6th memoir,  Twenty Years: After “I Do”. She speaks from the heart and bares her soul in her writing. I couldn’t recommend her books more highly. 
Debby is an ardent supporter of authors, featuring guest posts and interviews, reblogs, book reviews, tips and tricks, and much more. She is an inspiration and a woman I am proud to call Sister and Friend. 
Join me in congratulating Debby on launching her new book. She frequently shares her fellow authors’ posts, so please do her the honor of sharing this, or heroriginal launch post, to your social networks. Thank you so much ♥  

Twenty Years: After "I Do" by D.G. Kaye

Buy the bookHERE
(universal link) 

BLURB
May/December memoirs.

In this personal accounting, D.G. Kaye shares the insights and wisdom she has accrued through twenty years of keeping her marriage strong and thriving despite the everyday changes…

View original post 624 more words

Deflector shield up….

Calvin and Hobbes by Bill Watterson

I received a letter a few weeks ago with a recall to hospital for more investigations after a routine mammogram. Having walked a path with cancer a few times I had the expectation that I could take news like this in my stride. I didn’t and was instantly swamped in fear, which frightened me more than the news. My deflector shield came up, I closed off and when prodded came out verbally swinging. I was lost to myself for a while.

Georgie guessed that something was badly amiss and within a day he got me to share the news with him. He promised that no matter what happened we would deal with it together, which we did till I got the all clear.

I thanked the hospital team for the gift of their care and attention and it has taken me a few weeks to realise that there was a greater gift nestled within my fearful reaction.

Georgie’s response taught me that love can flow in many ways and I can trust the different ways that others flow with, even if their ways are not like my forms of loving expression. That first day he took me out for a walk and a yummy meal to the place where we had our first date. Over the next few days we leant in to our banter and shared jokes and when we got the all clear he took me out for our favourite breakfast. The one we started each day with in Lisbon; the place where many magic memories were created.

Parkgate, The Wirral

As the days carried on I joined the knitting girls at a Lulu concert and during the show I glanced down the row at all their happy faces. It is many months since we have all been together and the loving light we hold for each other is still there to see.

Then the family gathered for my Mum’s 80th Birthday celebrations. As I looked around the table at her three children and their families, with shared connections, memories and love we all hold for each other. There was a special light shining out.

Happy Birthday Mum ❤

The big lesson in all this is that I no longer need a deflector shield in love. Life has blessed me with a partner who stands beside me in vulnerability and who can meet fear with thoughtful actions. I appreciate his loving ways and celebrate the differences in how we each show love. The expectations on how I was measuring his love have melted away along with my deflector shield. Ohh, the freedom and joy in that. ❤

When the lights go out……

In Edwardian times this house was lovingly built to shelter maritime widows and various rescue projects have been attempted in the last few years, though none have taken root yet.

I feel the loving light around this place.

We all shine a light, even though some of us feel that our light has dimmed, if not gone out completely. I hear the words ‘I feel nothing’, ‘I feel restless’ and ‘I feel lost’ so often. This disconnection we are experiencing as a society is also felt within. It’s chicken and egg as to what came first, but there is no denying that it is there.

I recall years ago a heated conversation with an experienced consultant. We were handling a project together and she was livid that I was giving space and time to incorporate people’s feelings into what we were doing. Her reaction was pure emotion (which was ironic) and she was adamant that by focussing on the tasks at hand, the project would be completed. My stance was that we all act from how we feel, so if people’s feelings were not acknowledged then it would undermine whatever activity was taking place. True connection comes from people being seen (obviously within reason) so to deny feelings was storing up a whole heap of trouble for later. She accused me of being ‘girly’, we agreed to disagree and I stepped back. She is still working as a business consultant and I am now a therapist.

Reaching out to connect fully can be felt, every time. Everything is energy and listening, a loving thought shared, a smile seen, a cheek kissed, loving words heard, hands held and dreams gifted space to spark, all flow out as loving energy.

Love is felt and builds connection. ❤


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