Posts Tagged 'love'

Holding our loving space….

In my sifting and sorting this week I have re-discovered my Granny’s tea set in a box. I have started to use her cups and I am going to plant her teapot, sugar bowl and jug up with spring plants. I let my Mum (her daughter) know about my discovery and then we went on to talk about family treasures in my space. The embroidered cloths that Mum has passed my way, Granny’s sewing basket that I use nearly every day, the bookcase that my Dad gifted his Mum when he got his first paycheck is with me too, holding my beloved books. Creative treasures that Emily, my daughter, has made over the years are here too, with a set of her paintings alongside a creative table I have put together. Everything in one place and accessible, so that I can create in a spark and not have to hunt for anything, or set anything out. Marvellous.

Each circle in each day brings me back to a calm centre within, where I am held in a loving space.

Sharp winds of change have blown through life lately and I have found peace in this calm centre. It’s not about denial of upset, because as feelings rise up like waves, I acknowledge them and then ‘park’ them. In turning my mind back to the nurture of creativity, and what soothes naturally, the temptation to layer up against the pain doesn’t happen. I flow with accepting that it is how it is.

So many times in my work and life I meet souls layered up and sheltering behind their shields. Sometimes so layered up that they have managed to convince themselves that they don’t need nurture at all. So many painful stories from the past playing out as if they are still happening now.

We are like vessels that fill up and whatever we hold inside gives us the view on how we experience life.

I spend my working days helping others to unpack and gift themselves some room within to breathe and explore new perspectives and options. Recently, a client said ‘I am sorry Jane, I can’t tell you what you have just said, but your voice is so calm I’m falling asleep.’ I burst out laughing, which made him chuckle…laughter and calm in his inner space. ❤

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Buds are appearing…

Yesterday the weather had settled a little and the Isle of Man catamaran ran again. She sailed through the gentle falling rain into port, yet with barely a ripple on the water. Today it is lashing it down with a mixture of snow and sleet with rain and hardy fisherman are sheltering in their tents on the prom, not even letting the weather deter them from their ‘timeout’.

There is a natural cycle that is never ending out there as the branches are waving in the wind. All the old leaves have fallen and if you look closely enough the signs of new buds are coming. The tree roots go way down into the ground, yet the branches, buds, blossom, fruit and leaves change throughout each year. Occasionally, the tree breaks and uproots when the storms rage.

I have been given pause to ponder lately on what happens when we don’t let our old leaves drop. Hanging on putting additional weight and pressure on our branches and in time choking the promise of life out of any new buds.

There is a vulnerability in letting the leaves go, as our branches are left bare and exposed with every single knot, scar, wrinkle, dent and bump there for all who care to see.

Carrying old leaves will give us a tree that resembles the old tree and the added weight can bend the branches beyond anything recognisable, as we shelter behind old foliage.

It’s painful to let the wind blow through your bare branches and feel the rainfall. Yet the wisdom in letting the rain in nourishes roots, allows the wind to strengthen foundation and the light to nurture new buds.

I am more than aware of the simplicity of my words and the meaning contained therein, yet sometimes the cry for simplicity can rage through the wildest of storms.

Creative comforts….

Work is challenging at this time of year and a few days ago I found myself needing comfort from a change of scene at midday. I took off in the car and made my way to a haberdashery store in Birkenhead. Ohhh, the bliss of standing there amidst all the materials, ribbons and yarns and new choices to be made. I came away with an uplifted heart and a bag of lovely soft wool to make Georgie’s next jumper.

Often I find myself suggesting to clients that they find comfort in creativity. They often cry out ‘But I am not creative Jane’. I gently point out that we all create with our days, spaces, meals, communications and actions. The simple act of tidying a drawer, sorting some clothes, organising a space, re-arranging a shelf or even a room can bring comfort. It’s all creativity. We can also be creative with writing, painting, sticking, colouring or making something.

I was blessed to be surrounded by loving, creative women as I grew up and my Mum, both my Grannies and my Great Granny taught my sister and I all the handcrafts. What gifts they bestowed along with rich memories.

There was a lovely blog post recently from Natalie Wordless Wednesday… as she shared the quilts she and her sister were creating. It reminded me of the creative ‘sharings’ with my Mum, my buddy Pam in South Africa, my sister Debs, the knitting girls, Kirsten, lovely Em in New Zealand, special Penn, Nancy downstairs, my sailing buddy Wendy and so many more. All linked by our stories and sharing what we are creating; all linked by loving comfort. ❤

Deflector shield up….

Calvin and Hobbes by Bill Watterson

I received a letter a few weeks ago with a recall to hospital for more investigations after a routine mammogram. Having walked a path with cancer a few times I had the expectation that I could take news like this in my stride. I didn’t and was instantly swamped in fear, which frightened me more than the news. My deflector shield came up, I closed off and when prodded came out verbally swinging. I was lost to myself for a while.

Georgie guessed that something was badly amiss and within a day he got me to share the news with him. He promised that no matter what happened we would deal with it together, which we did till I got the all clear.

I thanked the hospital team for the gift of their care and attention and it has taken me a few weeks to realise that there was a greater gift nestled within my fearful reaction.

Georgie’s response taught me that love can flow in many ways and I can trust the different ways that others flow with, even if their ways are not like my forms of loving expression. That first day he took me out for a walk and a yummy meal to the place where we had our first date. Over the next few days we leant in to our banter and shared jokes and when we got the all clear he took me out for our favourite breakfast. The one we started each day with in Lisbon; the place where many magic memories were created.

Parkgate, The Wirral

As the days carried on I joined the knitting girls at a Lulu concert and during the show I glanced down the row at all their happy faces. It is many months since we have all been together and the loving light we hold for each other is still there to see.

Then the family gathered for my Mum’s 80th Birthday celebrations. As I looked around the table at her three children and their families, with shared connections, memories and love we all hold for each other. There was a special light shining out.

Happy Birthday Mum ❤

The big lesson in all this is that I no longer need a deflector shield in love. Life has blessed me with a partner who stands beside me in vulnerability and who can meet fear with thoughtful actions. I appreciate his loving ways and celebrate the differences in how we each show love. The expectations on how I was measuring his love have melted away along with my deflector shield. Ohh, the freedom and joy in that. ❤

Circles of change….

First thing this morning the light was full of depth and I sat here preparing to start work filled with peace.

The tides are different every day and today the spray is flying high in the wind out there. I sit listening and talking to troubled souls from all over the world as I watch the sea in it’s natural rhythm.

Every single grain of sand on the beach is washed and moved, every single day. It’s a natural circle and each grain changes every time, all flowing together.

Many telephone calls that come in are filled with anguish as change is resisted, battled and fought against. Folk are exhausted from hanging on to things, people, feelings and situations that do not balance with them. They want the tide to stop. They fear change. We have all been there, sometimes many times.

We all have tides washing over us and some days we roll with ease, some not so much. Bless the other grains who roll with love for us and with us. I love the grains on my life beach. ❤

Leaving the social media arena…..

The medieval tower at the mouth of the Tagus River, Lisbon

I was writing a card to treasured friend today, as it’s her birthday in a few days time. We met many, many moons ago (before my daughter was born) when she and I were neighbours and our loving friendship has flowed through all these years.

Recently, Georgie and I had a magic time in Lisbon and it has been a struggle to recapture the peace we discovered since we returned to our daily rounds.

I have also been watching a manipulation grow through social media and it feels unbalanced, if not downright cruel and unjust at times.

So, with a strong desire to have time to honour the connections I love and cherish, I have deleted my Facebook, Twitter and PInterest accounts.

I love the Global Village we have in our blogging world and this has gifted loving bonds and supportive connections and long may that continue.

Loving connections…

A lovely friend and I sat on a farmhouse balcony and shared afternoon tea today and this was our view.

I attended a routine hospital appointment this afternoon and she insisted on giving me a lift. The phone call with that offer was hilarious, as I initially resisted her kind suggestion. Why do we do that ‘No, it’s alright I can manage’ thing when anyone tries to be kind! It’s nuts. Anyway, mid conversation, as I was resisting, this was her deciding line:

‘Please do not deprive me of your company. I have missed you and it will be lovely to have a catch-up and I need to go there anyway to check on where things are when I have my appointment next month.’

I responded with ‘That is the most sophisticated emotional blackmail I have heard for some time.’

Much laughter followed, which set the theme for this afternoon.

We drove straight there, parked with ease, found the required hospital section and I was called in right away. Marvellous.

Then we walked out and turned left instead of right, talking nineteen to the dozen and completely oblivious to our error. As we walked out of the exit door we faced a car park we didn’t recognise.

‘This isn’t car park G’ my lovely friend said.

‘I am deeply impressed that you remember which ‘letter’ car park we are in’ I replied.

Several corridors, exits and different car park views later, we admitted we were lost. Various staff members were unable to help us either.

It was a comedy of errors and finally (and I do mean some time later) another nurse tried to help us. Suddenly I recalled that I had tucked the hospital letter and a map into my handbag. It is a testimony to my friend’s love, that she didn’t clock me one as I produced it.

We found our way and left two nurses shaking their heads at us, thinking goodness knows what, as we went to the farmhouse nearby and had afternoon tea to recover.

As we sat nattering on the balcony, looking out at the view, we both agreed that the love and understanding that our group share (there are a few of us) is a gift, liberally sprinkled with shared laughter. ❤


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