Posts Tagged 'trust'

Love Restoration

Doris modelling re-purposed jeans and fabric from various dresses

The pull to go quiet could not be ignored a while ago as a wealth of change rolled in. I was not managing to wrap myself around everything that was calling for attention.

Hitting the pause button carved out some space. I didn’t try to make anything happen, as I just let myself be. I found peace in leaning into the discomfort of change and not knowing immediately what to do to ‘fix’ it. Who says things always have to be ‘fixed’?

Many moons ago, back in the eighties, I used to make clothing for friends from a vague idea, or a strand of conversation. Then I forgot that I loved doing that.

Recently, I was searching for a creative workshop that a friend and I could do together, as her birthday pressie. I came across one re-purposing clothes, but it was fully booked. I went to bed that night and had a dream about the things I used to make. Waking up excited, I started to explore the idea and it came together effortlessly. I already had a sewing machine, my dining table is now a work bench and I have years of stored threads, ribbons, buttons and my Granny’s old sewing basket. As soon as I mentioned this to my birthday friend she lent me her dressmaker’s dummy, who was immediately nicknamed Doris. The re-cycling contacts that have been established with my de-cluttering business were delighted to be of use and I simply started to create clothes. My friend asked to come here for her birthday, so we could be together and knit. Cake was involved and it was lovely. ❤

I find myself waking up with designs and ideas in my head.

Internet research and some experimentation with different platforms led me to open an eBay shop. Another dream gifted me the idea of taking the photographs on our roof terrace with The Mersey and Liverpool as a backdrop.

This name seemed perfect…

I can step back from taking on new de-cluttering clients now and spend some days creating, whilst still flowing with loving family care and my existing clients.

Happy days, as I’m just off to edge a jacket. The edge was an old blouse of mine, but as I took it out the wardrobe I thought ‘Ohhh, that would make a perfect edge for the jacket I picked up the other day.’ Then I reached for my scissors. I will end up going out dressed, but only just!

https://www.ebay.co.uk/str/loverestoration

The tide still runs…

Gosh, getting the hang of the new WP editor is fun (not!!). Sometimes change for change’s sake, at other times because life flows in the unexpected.

A few months ago my phone rang on a Sunday morning and Dad said ‘We’re in trouble, can you come?’ My mum was lying in the back yard with a broken hip and wrist.

What flowed from that was a steep learning curve for all of us, with moments of loving grace, sharpness from ‘front line’ living, organisation, getting to grips with new social terminology, healing, care, the kindness of strangers and keeping the ship afloat. All bonded together with fear, resistance to change, quick decisions, prayers and love.

We’re several months down the road and a new routine has emerged. Mum is healing well (down to her indomitable spirit), Dad is less fearful yet poorly, support is in place and I have returned to my home, with regular visits back to flow care. Mum and I ‘sing from the same hymn sheet’ and cherish our teamwork. ❤

The tide still runs outside the house I call home as I pick up the threads of my life and business. Grateful for this peaceful space and treasured friends, who flow with unquestioning love and support.

As I go back into my clients’ homes I find myself asking the question ‘What do you need now?’ The answers have been varied and surprising. Two lovely souls needed help rediscovering the love of their homes, with each home as different as they are. We’ve had fun planning, exploring in local DIY stores and experimenting. The things we’ve purchased on-line have gifted the most fun. I found myself holding some beautiful dolphin decals yesterday , looking at my client and commenting ‘Gosh, maybe we ought to have checked the measurements!’ They are now leaping across her bathroom window and loo seat, raising smiles for all who need her bathroom.

It’s been a sign of discovery for me. ❤

Loving roots manifest…..

The phone has started to ring for my new venture and not one call has been for cleaning. Most calls start with ‘Hello Jane, can you……?’ and the requests are for help with de-cluttering; sifting, sorting and creating calm in their homes, for all sorts of reasons and happenings. My heart is touched that folk feel safe to share their vulnerability.

Things are brought back to my happy bubble and I am selling on anything of use to others. Then in turn passing on clothing and accessories to my aqua buddy, who runs a second hand clothing shop. Anything else not obviously saleable is going to my buddy down the road, who runs a house clearance service and shop. He has been there for years and often helps those in difficulties with gifts for their homes. He gifted me some tins with lids, and with a named tape (and heart) on the handle of each one, they sit on my shelf to collect the abundance for my clients as their things sell.

It’s all community based and as I returned home yesterday I felt full of loving gratitude. The people I am meeting, love, stories and laughter we are sharing, hard graft, fresh air, support of loved ones and buddies and loving roots manifesting. I thought I would be cleaning, but life had another purpose and I am loving how this is growing. ❤

Chop wood and carry water….

Pause and repeat; there were more gladioli at the supermarket, in a bucket without water, and they found their way home with me. As they revived and opened, these glorious blooms have brought beautiful hope into each room.

A lovely friend and I discovered that we have been saying the same phrase recently; ‘Chop wood and carry water’. ❤ Valerie.

Each day we flow with our daily round and do what needs to be done. Amidst it all, instinctive wisdom has had space to float up and I am grateful for that. Knitting helps; as my hands are busy, I can hear my inner self in the silence.

A monthly craft stall is arranged for the creativity that is pouring forth from my hands. When did we get so busy that doing the things that come naturally, that love and nurture us, became relegated to a hobby?

The flyers for my cleaning care project are at the printers.

Each day I chop wood and carry water, yet the stirrings of the 'new' are there as they take shape. Naturally making themselves heard, without judgment, as I learn to cease judging myself. Loving care and support from beloved connections flows daily.

I feel that if we try and hold on to anything that does not balance for us; ways, people, patterns, roles, thoughts, actions, judgment and labels….we tear.

On a light note; when I talked to a friend about my cleaning care project, her immediate response had us creased with laughter.

'I always knew you were a scrubber.'

Our furry friends know….

‘Image from Pixabay’

Nowadays, it’s all too easy to get overwhelmed and to keep pushing, doing, solving, fixing and hoping that this will balance everything out.

A pause to let things settle; to see what actually needs our attention and what we can just let be, is what we need when overwhelm hits. There are probably some spinning plates that can be left to drop too, if only we get the quiet and space to see that.

One evening this week I dive bombed into the pool for Aqua Zumba and it hit me; I was worn out on all levels. I had missed it building up and as I walked home, I felt weepy.

A dog, taking an evening stroll with her Dad, came alongside me and nudged my leg with her head. I slowed my pace right down to her amble and stroked her head. She kept walking beside me, nudging my leg and looking up.

Her ‘Dad’ laughed and said ‘Anbody would think she was with you.’

I smiled at him and asked her name.

‘Tess’ he smiled back, and with silent empathy he left Tess and I to amble back to the end of my home street together.

Tess and I nattered about the weather, her day and mine, and I carried on stroking her head, as she rubbed against my leg.

Yesterday, blessed with the flexibility of self employment, I was able to drop the reins for a few hours and nap. Then I was clear on what actually required my attention.

Bless Tess and Boris, as I am going to spend the weekend caring for him at his home and bless life’s grace to be with our furry friends, who just know. ❤

Romantic rescuing…

I made a new video for my YouTube channel yesterday and it’s a tricky topic, so I pushed myself into a vulnerable space to share from my own experience. There’s a fine line between sharing to support others and simply banging on about yourself, so I hope I haven’t crossed it!

It has taken me many years to work something out and I did not truly ‘get it’ until I understood my ‘Why’. Also, as I work with my spirit guides, I see things in pictures, so I tend to talk that way. This story is full of pictures….

I have been a romantic lighthouse and rescuer for many years. My natural way of being would shine a loving light and this drew in souls who were struggling to sail in ‘holed’ boats. They would beach themselves on my rocks and I would don my rescue cape and dash down with my repair kit. I compounded this by not only trying to repair their boats, but then jumping in and sailing with them. Some of these adventures lasted many years and I would be called upon to repair new holes and keep the boat afloat.

This was ‘roses round the door, birds singing in a blue sky’ kind of thinking and not balanced. My own boat had holes and I was trying to repair it and bail it out by doing the same thing for others, whilst not repairing my own.

The latest painful relationship break-up brought me to my senses. The pain was so acute, that this time I cracked wide open and had no choice but to lovingly ask myself ‘Why’.

You see it is no-one else’s fault. Their boats, the water they sail in, the sails they set, the harbours they enter and the actions they take; are their lives and choices. I needed to make different choices and in order to do that, I had to understand why I was making the choices I had been.

So I paused. Life carries on and I still needed to flow care to those I love and to make a living to support myself, but I stripped everything else back.

I came to see my peaceful home as a boat house, as I left the lighthouse life behind (along with my cape and rescue kit) and went to work on my boat.

I started to do things I love, drawing threads of those into my everyday and I also experimented with new things. Nothing happens instantly, so I gift myself time too.

Recently, I have taken my repaired and re-vamped boat out sailing. She’s holding up well, and with gentle on-going adjustments, I am trying out a new business (alongside my existing one) and venturing further afield. I feel grateful for the myriad of blessings that flow from sailing with other souls, who are out there in all manner of craft, as the sea winds of life flow between us, yet we all sail together with loving curiosity.

Aug ’18 update: I have removed all my videos from YouTube.

There’s always something…

Early on Saturday morning I sat out on the sky garden and a Blackbird, perched on the roof opposite, was singing his heart out with a background chorus provided by the harmonious sparrows.

Then the Police helicopter flew over and started to circle.

After a good few months, and multiple visits from different telecoms engineers, the crackling landline was fixed yesterday. My relief was palpable and my Mum was the first one to ask if I had baked him a cake.

Happily flowing with telephone calls today, my landlord started to mow the back lawn underneath my window. Given the number of trees in pots out there, this is a lengthy and challenging task and noisy, very noisy.

The craft group I started in the local heritage centre has been loyally supported by my buddies, but has not caught the interest of anyone else. Time to gently fold it.

When I was there I met Carla from The Kollective and she has invited me to join her local artist’s group.

At Aqua Zumba we all share and support and even if we are weary from a long day, it lifts each and every one of us. One of the lifeguards keeps pace with all our moves poolside and he’s hilarious.

The other evening the music speaker started to break and then kept going silent for several minutes. We all started to sing our hearts out, filling the gaps and with great spirit, keep moving at the same time. A round of applause, huge grins and much laughter, as the class finished.

There was a wonderful program on the BBC recently, about villages, towns and cities entering the ‘In Bloom’ annual competition. I loved watching it for the community spirit and the wealth of ideas that sprang forth. Being blessed to know so many by their first name in our local area, it struck me that a community project would bring much love in. This has stayed as a thought, till yesterday.

I was dashing home with groceries, when I saw a group tending to the grassy area at the top of our little cobbled street, next to a parking places and the main road. I went over and talked to them. From love, they have come together and are tending to local public areas and planting flowers and I have been invited along to their next get together.

Taking a break for lunch today, I went to sit out in the sky garden. The Blackbird was back on his perch, singing his heart out, with the sparrows supporting him, as the tide went out and the waves caught the highest point of the beach, shushing along in time. ❤


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